AQPW Magazine: Shoot First, Ask Questions Never

The camera fades in on a rather nice hotel room.  The sunlight streaming in from the window shows that morning has just broken.  A lone figure in the room stirs slightly, sitting up... it's Milfeulle Sakuraba, in pink pajamas, yawning and smiling.  She walks over to the curtains, sliding them open and greeting the day.  She turns on the lights and gets to preparing for the day, making her way over to her bedside table and checking her cell phone messages.

Milfeulle: Oh... a message from Miss Peacecraft!  Hm... it says... congratulations on making it to Singularity.  You've proven yourself...

The camera cuts to a large public gym, where Reiko Ando is sitting on a weight bench with a barbell loaded with hundreds of pounds sitting on the rack behind her, checking her phone.

Reiko: ... to be the best in your division, and it's time to prove yourself against everyone else.  The preliminaries...

The camera cuts to a doughnut shop, where Kiyone Makibi sits with a cup of coffee and a doughnut, checking her cell phone.

Kiyone: ... are as laid out at the end of Ultra Beatdown, with the winners facing each other in a three-way-dance in our final main event, where the last fall...

The camera cuts to Rally Vincent, standing outside an auto detail shop, checking her cell phone as employees in the background clean her classic 1967 model Shelby Mustang Cobra GT500 with white racing stripes.

Rally: ... will be hardcore.  But sometime today, I want each of you girls to go to hotel room 322, as per the attached schedule.  Since this night will be...

The camera cuts to the front of a strip mall full of souvenir stands and trendy clothing stores, where Ran Kotobuki stands outside, checking her cell phone with tons of bags hanging off her arms.

Ran: ... all about you, I wanted the final magazine to be all about you.  All six of you will give a 'shoot promo' in a classic American fashion...

The camera cuts to Chiri Kitsu, sitting on the deck next to the hotel pool in her usual bikini, checking her cell phone.

Chiri: ... where no topic is off limits.  Good luck at Singularity, where we return to where it all began... the Anime Queens Pro Wrestling arena.  Signed: Relena Peacecraft.

Chiri closes her cell phone, seemingly deep in thought.  The shot abruptly cuts to one of the hotel rooms... a still shot showing that the camera must be sitting on something unattended, showing just the couch of the hotel room and a large plastic banner reading "Anime Queens Pro Wrestling Presents: Singularity" and the URL of the website taking up most of the wall.  A very low-budget shoot reminiscent of some popular wrestling 'shoot' videos.  Rally Vincent walks into the room first, taking a seat on the couch and looking at the camera with a smile.

Rally: Wow... well... man, it's kind of a scary time, isn't it?  I mean, so many weird things going on in the world, and Chicago seems to be the epicenter of a lot of it.  Things can get pretty hot in Chicago.  Me and Minnie May made a lot of money off of that fact... and there are very few regrets.  Maybe if we'd chosen our friends a little more closely and not taken certain jobs, we'd be in a better place.  I mean, not that I'm complaining.  But the underworld is the underworld.  I just kinda hope me and Minnie May made a difference in the end.  Yeah, back then it was all about the money, but looking back... it's nice to have my old car back, and to run with Minnie May again.  And we had a pretty nice run.  First ever Tag Team champions, and May sacrificed herself so I could get into Singularity.  May, you don't know how hard I campaigned with Relena to give you that seventh slot at Singularity.  But in the end, I'll be representing Gunsmith cats alone.  I don't know... I've been thinking about what Chiri Kitsu said at the end of Ultra Beatdown.  About standing on my own at the very end.  In the end, May, we both knew the Cats wouldn't last forever.  We'd both eventually have to move on.  But trust me... when I beat Chiri Kitsu, and I end up becoming the Goddess of Anime Queens Pro Wrestling, whatever that means, I want you right there by my side.  I wouldn't have gotten this far without your help.  Respect.

Rally smiles, getting up, miming shooting a gun at the camera, and walking out.  There's a brief time skip (although, with all the natural light blocked out of the room, it's impossible to tell how long) before Ran Kotobuki enters.  She's all dolled up with tacky and trendy animal prints, her red trenchcoat, lots of gaudy dime-store jewelry and long nails and boots.  She takes a seat on the couch, crossing her legs and grinning, tracing the red streak in her hair.

Ran: You see this?  That's my style.  My individuality.  That's something nobody can ever take away from me.  I'm a three-time X-Division champion.  Nobody can take that away either.  I'm the queen bitch of Shibuya.  And most importantly, I'm the penultimate gal.  And I'll prove it when I flatten that steroid junkie Reiko Ando, and become the Goddess of AQPW.  Gals are all about looking good, feeling good, and doing whatever the hell you want.  But the great thing that sets me apart from all other gals?  I know this isn't gonna last forever.  I know that eventually, I'm gonna have to grow up.  But just because I'm gonna grow up, doesn't mean I'm gonna grow out of being a gal.  Even if I end up becoming a police officer like my annoying parents, or end up marrying Tatsuki, I'm still gonna wear the trendiest clothes, I'm still gonna have the most awesome tech, I'm still gonna kick the crap out of anyone who stands in my way.  And even if that means Tatsuki leaves me, even if I end up alienating my friends and family, even if I end up losing everything and being alone... even if... it doesn't matter.  Even if... even if my sister Sayo ends up... I mean, it's not like she looks up to me, right?  She's smart enough to... she wouldn't... it's an iron-clad...

Ran slowly stands up, running a hand through her hair with a nervous expression on her face.  Apparently lost in thought, she walks out of the room.  Another time skip before Kiyone Makibi enters, dressed in her more casual clothes rather than her Galaxy Police outfit, taking a seat on the couch.

Kiyone: Well... I know I'm one of the few people here who hasn't been here from day one, but I've seen a lot more than people think.  Back during the days of EBW, when Ryoko and Ayeka were warring, the whole Tenchi household was watching... although Sasami and Washu did a pretty good job at hiding, even from us, that they were behind the entire federation.  And now, Kiyone and I were supposed to be brought in as a tag team.  But then, at Griefer's Paradise, I had an opportunity... and I just couldn't turn it down.  It was either hope that the fans chose Mihoshi and me at Gunboat Diplomacy, or go ahead and take that open challenge.  And I like to think that I've done right by Anime Queens since then.  Lieutenant Kitsurubami and I have torn down the house twice.  And now, the biggest name in AQPW hand-picked me to wrestle her in the preliminaries.  Milfeulle, I have to commend you.  You could have walked out of Ultra Beatdown with that title the first time, and nobody would have faulted you.  But you demanded the match be restarted; you demanded to win the title fairly.  And when you did, you proved to everyone in the back that you more than deserve to be a two-time Heavyweight champion.  And the best possible way I can show you respect is by giving you my all.  Right now, I can't even focus on the main event.  Because going up against a true, deserving, fighting Heavyweight champion is enough of a challenge to focus on.  And believe me, I'm gonna give you everything I have at Singularity.  Good luck.

Kiyone smiles, getting up and making her leave.  Another timeskip before Chiri walks in, holding her bloody shovel in one hand and wearing her usual school outfit.  She remains standing, staring down at the camera as blood drips from her shovel.

Chiri: Revolutionary Girl Utena.  Bleach.  The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya.  Naruto.  In the end, the Hardcore title was secondary to my campaign to set the worlds of anime and professional wrestling to right.  And in the end, there was so much more I could have done.  Neon Genesis Evangelion, One Piece, Ninja Resurrection, the list of horrible anime out there is vast and endless.  But in the end, I have to ask... has anyone heard me?  Does anybody truly care?  I'm putting out my own personal message, but does anybody accept it?  I'm sure these horrible shows will still have their cult followings long after people finally accept that Sayonara, Zetsubou Sensei isn't getting a fourth season.  But if my transmission isn't received, then I might as well get to work on digging my own grave and filling it with bamboo spikes so that on the way down, I'll at least be able to experience something.  These worlds have to end.  And you have to end them, Milfeulle.  You're the conquering hero, you're the comeback kid.  And I'm the slaughtering demon who's yet to lose a single match.  The irresistible force and the immovable object.  I have every confidence that I'm going to beat Rally Vincent.  But you need to beat Kiyone.  Then, whoever the third interloper is, be it Ran Kotobuki or Reiko Ando, it won't matter.  If the worlds of anime and pro wrestling are to be set to right at Singularity, then you have to slay the monster and be the conquering hero, Milfeulle.  Look.  Look at me.  The monster inside me is growing.  As if anybody cares.  My part in the story is the most important part, next to yours, Milfeulle.  All this time, I've just been digging my own grave.  Bury me, Milfeulle.  Bury me, and end this world.  Or I'll bury you and destroy it.

Chiri fixes the part in her hair and walks out.  Another timeskip before Reiko Ando, in her competition one-piece, enters and takes a seat on the couch.

Reiko: It's been an honor to come here.  I know I was ushered her under the "Marshall Lee" rule, where you can freely obsess over side characters that barely show up, but it's still... it's still been a great experience.  I can only hope Fred's been watching me.  I know not that many people followed the Intercontinental division, but with four different champions, it was a struggle to get here, and it's gonna be a problem taking on Ran Kotobuki, and whatever she's got planned.  It's only going to be four matches, so odds are the show's gonna be shorter than the rest, but I know it's gonna be a real important four matches.  It's the night that they couldn't have in EBW.  The night where the best of each division fight to see who's the best overall... while there was no question that Osaka and Ryoko were the best at what they did, the question's still up in the air for Anime Queens Pro Wrestling.  I guess we're gonna answer that question at Singularity.

Reiko stands up, hitting a couple of bodybuilding poses before walking out, and the hotel room finally fades to black.  It fades back in on the interior of one of the AQPW control room trailers.  Relena sits alone, working on a couple of different screens, showing clips from the five 'shoot promos' shot earlier.  She sits back, closing her eyes and rubbing her forehead.  She looks over her shoulder as someone enters... it's Little Washu, holding a couple of bags of take-out.  She takes a seat and sets the bags on the table, the two sorting through the various containers.

Relena: So... do you think I've cleaned up your little mess satisfactorily?

Washu sighs, digging into some noodles.

Washu: Yes.  You were right.  I should have chosen you to run EBW instead of Ayeka.

Relena: Duly noted.

The two eat for a while as Relena continues working on the footage.

Relena: So... after Anime Queens Pro Wrestling ends with Singularity... what then?  Everyone just goes back through the Dimensional Generator, and back to their own lives?  They're already demolishing the EBW Arena, and demolition of the Rising Sunshine arena started the day before that.  This isn't like last time.  This really does feel like the end.

Washu: Well... yeah.  Sooner or later, everyone has to move on.  Everyone got to meet people they never would have run into before this, had amazing experiences and forged friendships.  Those who are going to die in their own worlds got a little extra time here.  But in the end, if nobody's gonna watch, there's no point in putting on a show.  I mean, we're able to pack the arena itself every month, but if nobody watching at home cares, then why waste the energy?  Eventually you're just screaming at a brick wall.  The wall doesn't give a crap.

Relena looks a bit concerned as Washu's face has steadily fallen over her speech.

Relena: It's not like a super-genius like you to get so nihilistic.

Washu: Well, when a super-genius makes mistakes... which isn't very often, I'll tell you that... it hits the hardest.  It's not about putting on a good show anymore.  It's about saving face.  Who knows, maybe someone a few years from now will discover Anime Queens and think it was entertaining, much like a few people are rediscovering Extreme Bishoujo Wrestling.  But there are so many other things I could be doing right now.  Heck, I was even thinking about... nah, there's no point in bringing it up.  Not gonna happen.

Relena leaned forward a bit, finally digging into her takeout.

Relena: Humor me, Miss Washu.

Washu: Well... I was almost considering bringing back a few of the girls from EBW and having them take on the girls of AQPW.  One final, huge crossover.  But there's no way that's going to happen.

Relena: And why couldn't it?  That sounds fascinating.

Washu: Because nobody cares!  Nobody remembers Extreme Bishoujo Wrestling, the ratings for Anime Queens Pro Wrestling aren't anywhere near what I thought they'd be... what's the point?

Relena leans back, intertwining her fingers for a minute before she turns back to the console.

Relena: I think our Heavyweight champion can put it a lot better than I can.  Take a look at this.

Washu sighs, turning her attention to the console in front of Relena.  The shot fades to the scene on the console... Milfeulle's 'shoot promo'.  Milfeulle Sakuraba walks into the hotel room, dressed in a long flowing pink dress with her usual flowered headband.  She politely sits down on the couch, putting on a brave smile.

Milfeulle: Wow... it's certainly been a long, crazy ride, hasn't it?  It's hard to believe it's only been a few months.  I still remember taking on Android 18 at our first ever show, Revenger... I remember seeing a lot of the people here at that show.  It's been a long, hard journey for all of us.  I remember having to deal with Sailor Galaxia... and Galaxia, I meant it when I said that I hope you find happiness, that you find what you're looking for.  Regardless of what you've done to me, and done to the girls here, you still don't deserve the hand you were dealt.  And in beating you, I hope in some way, I showed you that love and justice can prevail.  And in the end, maybe helping you helped someone else as well.  I wish you nothing but hope... because I get the feeling that you haven't had a whole lot of that recently.

Milfeulle sighs, looking at the carpet for a minute before bringing her gaze back to the still camera.

Milfeulle:  And now... through Revenger, through The Great American Trainwreck, through Griefer's Paradise, through Gunboat Diplomacy and through Ultra Beatdown.  Everything's lead up to this moment.  I can see why they weren't able to do this in EBW, after most of the titles ended up vacant, but I do remember Lain talking about Singularity, and I was able to root around through some old EBW posters that advertised Singularity.  So now we're fulfilling the prophecy, I guess.  All I know is that it's the opportunity to give the people one last show.  I know not a whole lot of people are actually checking out the show, at least not as many as the WWE or TNA, All-Japan or New-Japan or Noah... but to the fans we do have, I just want to say thank you.  Without you, without the fans we do have, and have been able to keep over these last months, then there'd be no reason for any of us to even exist.  And that's why we do what we do, or at least why I do what I do.  For the fans.

Milfeulle smiles, blushing a bit.

Milfeulle: So it all comes down to Singularity.  If I'm able to beat Kiyone, then I move on to the main event.  And even if I'm not able to beat her, I know that she and I will put on the best possible match we can.  But even looking past that, you've got Rally and Chiri both out of their element, and you've got a giant taking on a lightweight.  And at the end, we're all going to get together and hash out our differences.    Back in the day, they called it "The Night the Line was Crossed"... what are they calling it now?  "The Night the Universes Crossed"?  Sounds like it makes sense.  But what happens once we cross over?  Is it just all over?  Do we just... cease to exist?  I'll admit, I really don't have the mental capacity to handle the big stuff like that.  I mean, I'm not stupid... but I guess in the end, instead of thinking about what comes after end, I'm more interested in leaving a couple more big matches for this world to enjoy.  I hope you've enjoyed this ride... I know I have.  It's been a hard ride, but the destination's worth it.

Milfeulle stands up, bowing politely.  She walks out, and the shot cuts back to the control room.  Washu closes her eyes, shaking her head as Relena leans back, focusing back on Washu.

Relena: I'm honored you gave me this opportunity, Washu.  It hasn't been easy, but it's always been exciting.  And in the end, we're here telling the world a story.  Whether they choose to revisit it long after we've gone home, after we've died, that's up to history.  The fact is... we've put it out there.  I don't expect someone as analytical as you to understand emotion like that, but that's alright, I guess it's just the politician in me that's more concerned with emotion.  But whatever happens, we're leaving a record that we existed.  And at Singularity, we're going out with a bang, just like they did at EBW: Forever.  In the end... it's up to them.

Washu: Them the fans, or them the wrestlers?

Relena: Exactly.

Washu stands up, walking out of the control room with her uneaten takeout in her arms... she gets as far as the doorway before looking over her shoulder.

Washu: I hope you're right.

Relena: I've got to be.  The alternative is too empty to comprehend.

Washu nods, walking out as Relena turns back to the console as the scene fades out.  The poster for AQPW: Singularity is shown briefly before fading out.